"What's the reason for the widespread use of the letter 'x' instead of '6'?"
Let's Talk About Sex, Baby: An Uncensored Talk About Sex with Heike Kleen
Talking about sex is like walking on a tightrope, balancing on the edge of what's comfortable and what's uncomfortable. Sexuality is the last sanctuary where we show our true selves, filled with fears and insecurities. Author and sex columnist, Heike Kleen, takes us on a journey through sex parties, dominus, and self-discovery.
ntv.de: Why's it still difficult to talk about sex?
Heike Kleen: We fear rejection, awkwardness, and judgment. The words we use for sex are either too clinical or too explicit, leaving little room for delightful banter. To bridge this gap, we have to painstakingly discover the erotic no-man's-land in between.
Why do kids think it's gross that their parents might have sex?
Before puberty, children associate sex with all things icky - not ready for it yet. In puberty, sex becomes something they can only imagine with fresh bodies, not with middle-aged people who just made sandwiches and chased monsters under the bed. Children want their parents to be safe havens, not sex machines.
Parents' fear of their children having sex?
Because the word "sex" suddenly becomes concrete, and suddenly strangers want their children's bodies. Bodies they haven't seen naked in a long time, bodies they may not be able to touch anymore. Parents have a million worries: intimacy photos on the net, assaults, sexual violence, diseases, pregnancies - all the scary thoughts swirling in their minds.
What kills libido, not motherhood?
It's not the children, but the structures mothers live in: the need to function, the responsibilities, the endless to-do lists, chronic sleep deprivation, and role expectations. Not celebrated for their peak performances, freedom and time would help mothers' libidos bounce back. And loving gazes that don't make them feel like they're failing.
Equality and sex?
Equality in sex means both partners sharing equal power, pleasure, and responsibility. It means consent is explicit and enthusiastic, boundaries are respected, and desires are deeply valued. It means sex is about connection, not just penetration.
Embracing equality for better sex?
Equality creates the foundation for genuine, satisfying sex because it lessons fear and encourages openness. It allows us to express desires, embrace vulnerability, and surrender without feeling small. Not being financially dependent on a partner means having sex that truly satisfies. But reflecting honestly on the equalities in our relationships might not immediately improve sex, but eventually make it more authentic.
How far away are we from understanding each other's genders?
We're still quite a distance, yet closer than ever. We're finally having open conversations about gender roles, power, and feelings. Understanding starts with active listening, not just talking. Many men feel attacked when discussing these topics, focusing on defense instead of listening. As long as understanding is confused with defending, we'll remain stuck in old patterns.
On the trail of sex shops - East Germany's introduction to eroticism
Your friend sees feminism and sex as the same, is he correct?
Perhaps he intuits it, it's a bit like a flirt with a political concept (laughs). Feminism fights for everyone to live and love freely and equally. Good sex starts right there - where no one submits, but both give themselves freely. Feminism also means self-determination. And sex is the most physical form of self-determination.
Menopause and sex retirement - facts or myths?
It doesn't have to be that way, but many women choose sex retirement voluntarily. It offers them the power to say: "The sex I've been offered in my life doesn't interest me anymore - and I'm not doing it anymore." Many women report a new, freer sexuality during menopause. Without cycles, without pressure, but with themselves, perhaps with a woman or even their own man.
Sex for everyone at every age - important or overhyped?
Sexuality is more than an act; it's part of our identity. Self-expression, closeness, and even masturbation are all integral aspects of sexuality. Despite society's influence, embracing our true desires is vital for personal growth and relationships.
Women talking more openly about sex, men keeping silent?
Women are more open about discussing desire, frustrations, and insecurities among themselves. Men, on the other hand, fears judgement, so they stay silent. Breaking free from societal expectations and embracing vulnerability is essential for fostering deep connections.
Turning an insecure man into a Don Juan, a lover?
By stopping trying to make him something (laughs). Both partners exploring together what they truly want. The times of men as initiators and women as reactors are over. And that's led to some uncertainty. Courage, kindness, and open communication can help navigate the challenges of these new roles.
Men moving to the right because women are too emancipated, creating unnecessary challenges?
Yes, perhaps it creates challenges - but also opportunities. Women's financial independence means they are no longer obligated to accept a man. Men must learn to adapt to new role models, accept uncertainty, and embrace change. Instead of losing, men have the chance to grow and be more themselves.
Language and sex - shaming or empowering?
Language shapes our ideas of normality and ourselves. Negative labels such as "slut" or "frigid" enforce control over women's bodies and desires. By changing the language, we expand our desires and challenge harmful societal norms.
"6 written with an X" - a question raised in Heike Kleen's book?
The book explores sexuality, empowerment, and individual expression. The phrase "Why is 6 written everywhere with x?" might be a metaphorical expression, a question symbolizing the exploration and transformation of identities and sexuality.
In the community, clear policies on sexuality and relationships can help create an environment where open discussions about lifestyle, fashion-and-beauty, books, and entertainment can flourish. A supportive policy could empower individuals to express themselves freely, fostering a society where self-discovery and inner growth are celebrated.
When discussing sexuality, it is essential to understand that every individual's experiences and desires are unique, just as diverse as the genres of books we enjoy or the trends in fashion-and-beauty we follow. Employment policies should acknowledge this fact and create an inclusive workplace where everyone feels comfortable discussing their personal lives, affording them the freedom to grow both professionally and personally.
