Terrifying Take on Everyday Life: The Film 'Final Destination Bloodlines' Reimagines the Mundane Blender as a Haunting Presence
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Small appliances and garden tools — items you'd usually expect to ease our lives — take a dark turn in "Final Destination Bloodlines." In this chilling flick, ordinary objects become sinister instruments of death, paying homage to the franchise's signature style of Rube Goldberg machine-like sequences.
In a twisted take on reality, everyday items turn into lethal weapons orchestrated in intricate, convoluted sequences that make simple tasks deadly complex. Frankly, Rube Goldberg would probably be horrified at how his contraptions are being used here.
Directors Zach Lipovsky and Adam B. Stein, setting the stage for the franchise's sixth installment, hope fans will be on edge, yet smiling through gritted teeth. I wasn't so sure about that; I braced myself for a suspenseful, gut-wrenching experience.
But, to my surprise, I found myself chuckling and even grinning. It turns out that humor is an excellent palate cleanser for gory horror. A witty script, as Mary Poppins might say, makes gruesome mayhem go down a whole lot easier.
One of the thrills in these movies is familiarity. We all know the drill. Death isn't something to be cheated; it's inevitable. The mystery lies in the methods of our demise.
The narrative opens with an adrenaline-pumping scene set in 1969 at a tower reminiscent of Seattle's Space Needle (though it was actually filmed in Vancouver). Skyview, an opulent restaurant up top, is hosting its grand opening.
Iris, a striking young woman, is there for a romantic dinner and, unbeknownst to her, a proposal. In the elevator, Iris attempts to calm her nerves. The elevator operator boasts the construction was completed months ahead of schedule, adding to her anxiety.
Upon arrival, Iris remains uneasy, but she manages to quell her nerves. When she accidentally nicks her finger, a drop of blood seeps out, and she quips, "I'll live," — a line that now seems eerily prophetic.
The ensuing chaos is a blur of popping rivets, crumbling structures, and lifeless bodies littering the ground. Parking attendants, blissfully unaware, listen to "Raindrops Keep Fallin' On My Head," written in 1969, one of many musical jokes scattered throughout the film.
Fast forward to the present, and a college student awakens from a troubling dream.
It turns out this nightmare is Stefani's, who faces the threat of academic expulsion due to her preoccupation with Skyview. Encouraged by her aghast roommate, Stefani determines to uncover the truth about Iris. Turns out the woman is her grandmother. Her uncle urges her to steer clear of the mentally unstable woman who lost custody of her children years ago.
Stefani suspects there's more to the story. She tracks down Iris in her remote cabin, learning that Iris not only survived the Skyview incident but also saved many lives thanks to her premonition. However, there's a catch: every person who cheated death years ago eventually met their end. The survivors were marked men and women, and their offspring, too — hence the movie's title. "Death is coming for our family," Iris warns.
What does this mean for Stefani? It means she has to save her family from a deadly fate. Everyday life becomes a deadly game.
A family barbecue starts off idyllic, but danger lurks beneath the surface. A garden rake lies menacingly just under a trampoline, and a large shard of glass waits, hidden in a blender. Somebody is going to die, but who, and how?
This sets the tone for the rest of the movie, as the stakes continue to rise with each grisly death. A tattoo parlor serves as the backdrop for one of the more creative Goldberg-inspired catastrophes. A scene in an MRI scanner takes things to a whole new, terrifying level.
But don't think it's all doom and gloom. The film also features moments of unexpected survival, providing a refreshing reprieve from the nonstop suspense. In one funny moment, I found myself scribbling "But actually, he doesn't die" on my notepad.
If you're not a horror fan, this probably isn't the flick for you. But if you enjoy a mix of thrills and chuckles, "Final Destination Bloodlines" delivers a suspenseful, yet entertaining, ride. Rated R for strong, grisly violence and language, the film will keep you anxiously watching, finger to your mouth — but with a gleam of wicked amusement in your eye.
- Toronto's law enforcement officials are investigating the strange and gruesome deaths in the city, where everyday objects have turned into lethal tools, echoing the events in the movie "Final Destination Bloodlines."
- As a local news report, I must warn our viewers of the increased warning signs in the entertainment industry regarding the health risks associated with certain movie sets, following accidents on the set of "Final Destination Bloodlines."
- In the realm of arts and culture, Toronto's art scene has been abuzz with debate on the ethics of using Rube Goldberg-inspired sequences in movies due to their troubling portrayal in "Final Destination Bloodlines."
