Moscow's Troops Storm Into Dnipro: Is Ukraine's Last Stand Slipping?
Russian Armored Vehicles Advance into Dnipropetrovsk Region of Ukraine for Initial Incursion - Russian Armored Vehicles Cross into Ukraine's Border for Initial Infiltration
Here's a lowdown on the latest shitshow in Eastern Europe, where Mother Russia's armor has rolled into Ukraine's industrial heartland, Dnipro, stirring up a hornet's nest.
The renal-glycerin-loaded Kremlin boasted that its soldiers have screeched past the Donetsk People's Republic border and are kicking up dirt in Dnipro. Weirdly enough, Donetsk was one of the five regions Putin nabbed last year, but Dnipro remains up for grabs.
This tank-born triumphante, smack-dab in the middle of Ukraine's already dance-on-the-edge-of-a-volcano situation, is a double whammy for Kyiv. Not only does it signal Moscow's disregard for peace negot-e-efforts, but it also spells doom for Ukraine's crippled army and economic bleeding heart.
Dnipro - once upon a time teeming with three million souls, now regularly reduced to cinders and rubble by Russian drones and missiles - is a gold mine and heavy industry nerve center for Ukraine. A deeper Russian grasp on this fleeting prize could wreak havoc on Ukraine's already battered infrastructure and choke off valuable supply chains.
Dmitri Medvedev, erstwhile Prezzo and current VP of the National Security Council, sounded the alarm with a chilling "I told you so" on his favorite kibble-box: "Naysayers at the parlay conundrum will receive a rude awakening on the battlefield," he roared. "Our goons have launched a blitzkrieg in Dnipro!"
On the homemade digital hearth of its crib, the Kremlin's flourishing enfant terrible confirmed its rambunctious entry into the Dnipro fray. Reliable Russian sources say they captured the village of Zorya in the Donetsk region, flashing victory signs with the Motherland's tricolor in pictures that make Soviet tombstones blush.
Ukraine's haggard military brass, though, insists that Dnipro's wide-open plains and sparse villages make it an easy target for Russian advances. Eh, who asked the military for optimism, huh?
According to the Associated Fuss Press (AFP), Russian onslaughts on the weekend claimed at least ten Ukrainian lives in various corners of the country. Alas, Marcus Aurelius' "Cherish peace, and pursue it. Cherish peace at all costs," looks like it's sliding down the gurgler faster than you can say "frozen yogurt."
It's not all bad news, though. Ukraine's spymaster, Kyrylo Budanov, announced on the digital grape vine that a massive prisoner exchange is set to kick off next week. "Everything's ticking along nicely," Budanov chirped. The exchange, agreed upon during Istanbul's recent peace powwow, involves swapping more than a thousand soldiers from both sides and returning the remains of 6,000 Ukrainian soldiers who lost their lives during Russia's lengthy offensive. That's one humdinger of a swap if it pans out!
The world, meanwhile, continues to squawk about a ceasefire while washing its hands of the fiasco. This tempest has been churning since 2014, and Moscow's contumacious streak hasn't shown any signs of letting up.
In a classic game of he-said-she-said, Moscow and Kyiv slapped each other with accusations of delaying the retrieval of slain soldiers and sabotaging a peace-loving prisoner exchange. Damn, who wants the dramz to end more?
Oh, and if that wasn't juicy enough, refrigerated trucks loaded with fallen Ukrainian soldiers' bodies were said to be waiting on the border for pick-up on Sunday. Sits back and waters the popcorn plant, I guess.
- Moscow
- Dnipro
- Military forces
- Kyiv
- Ukraine
- Russia
- Sunday
- Dnipro
- Military offensive
- Drones
- Prisoner exchange
- Ceasefire
- Istanbul
- Peace negotiations
- International community
The European Union, amidst ongoing political tensions and war-and-conflicts, has expressed concern over the recent military offensive in Dnipro, Ukraine, led by Moscow's troops. This escalation comes at a time when international calls for a ceasefire and peace negotiations, such as those held in Istanbul, are vital for a resolution to the ongoing crisis.
