Red Sox player Jarren Duran reveals his struggle with mental health, disclosing an attempt at suicide.
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In the US: Call or text 988, the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. Globally, contact resources like the International Association for Suicide Prevention and Befrienders Worldwide for crisis support.
Boston Red Sox star Jarren Duran candidly shares his harrowing experience with suicidal thoughts while struggling with his mental health following two challenging seasons in 2021 and 2022. This story unravels in episode four of the Netflix docuseries, "The Clubhouse: A Year With the Red Sox."
In this episode, Duran recounts how relentless negativity, both internal and external, pushed him into depression. "I'd think every day, 'I can't f**king do this,'" he confesses. "It was like I was already hearing it from the fans and what they say to me – it's like I hadn't already told myself 10 times worse than that in the mirror."
Duran faced a particularly challenging period when he attempted to take his own life, as he candidly reveals in the documentary. "I got to the point where I was sitting in my room, I had my rifle and I had a bullet, and I pulled the trigger, and the gun clicked, but nothing happened." His experience of what could've been a tragic event, Duran believes, was a sign that he wasn't meant to take his own life.
After this close brush with death, Duran found solace in self-reflection. He looked in the mirror and told himself, "Obviously, you're f**king here for a reason, so let's f**king be the way you want to be, let's play the way you want to play, and let's just live the way I want to live."
Red Sox president and CEO Sam Kennedy lauded Duran's courage for speaking out about his personal struggles in a statement to MLB.com. "Jarren's decision to share his story is an act of courage that reaches far beyond baseball," Kennedy said. "By opening up, he’s showing others who may be struggling that they’re not alone and that asking for help isn’t just OK, it’s essential."
The episode traces Duran's journey from a seventh-round draft pick in 2018 to one of the most promising young prospects in baseball. Despite an initially rocky start in 2021 and the subsequent season, Duran's career took a positive turn in 2023 when he was recalled from the minor leagues. In 2024, he made his first All-Star appearance and finished 8th in MVP voting.
The episode also delves into Duran's struggles adapting to playing in the outfield when he first made it to MLB, as well as the negative fan and media response to those struggles. "I feel like people see us as zoo animals sometimes 'cause we in this big old cage," Duran explains. "People are trying to throw popcorn at you, get a picture with you, get you attention, scream your name."
According to Duran, some fans take it too far, even commenting on his mental health, which he finds particularly distressing. "It just triggered me when you start talking about mental health... I feel like that's just part of it is that loneliness. Some people deal with it better than others."
Duran clarifies that he hasn't always read articles about himself, but sometimes it's challenging to escape the negativity. "I remember being at the stadium and hearing my name called, and they would boo," he recalls. "I'm like, 'Damn.'" He goes on to describe feeling like he was on "a fricking island all by myself and the world was falling apart beneath my feet."
Though specific details about the MLB's approach towards mental health support for professional athletes were not discussed in the article, it is known that all 30 teams are required to provide mental health services under the league's basic agreement. This includes access to a licensed psychologist for players.
Duran also reveals personal coping mechanisms he developed, such as journaling and writing affirmations. Before each game, he writes "f**k 'em" on his left wrist, a message to his demons, and "still alive" on his right wrist, a message to himself. Ultimately, Duran encapsulates his resilience by saying, "I'm still here and I'm still fighting."
Enrichment InsightsWhile specific details about the MLB's approach to providing mental health services for professional athletes were not discussed, there are several general resources and support systems available for athletes dealing with mental health issues:
- Unlimited Resilience: Offers mental health support and skill development for athletes of all ages.
- Athlete Mental Health Week (AMHW): Offers workshops, webinars, and a resource hub addressing various mental health topics, including stress, trauma, and social media use.
- Embark Behavioral Health: Focuses on emotional support, healthy habits, and seeking professional help when needed.
- Kindbridge: Helps athletes manage sports anxiety and related mental health issues through mindfulness, meditation, and professional counseling.
While these resources are not specific to the MLB, they illustrate the broader support system available for professional athletes struggling with mental health issues.
- Jarren Duran, the outfielder for the Boston Red Sox, found solace in self-reflection and journaling after his suicidal thoughts and struggles with mental health in 2021 and 2022, as he recalled in the Netflix docuseries, "The Clubhouse: A Year With the Red Sox."
- Despite the challenging period where Duran attempted to take his own life, he believed the gun clicking without firing was a sign that he wasn't meant to take his life, and this event motivated him to change his perspective and play the sport of baseball in a positive manner.
- As part of his coping mechanisms, Duran wrote affirmations on his wrists, such as "f**k 'em" to remind himself to ignore his demons and "still alive" as a reminder of his resilience, even when facing negative feedback from fans and the media.
