Slap-Bang, June 15th! Green Vines Day Rolls In
Protesters' Signage for June 15: No negotiation can be facilitated today
Mark your calendars, y'all! June 15th, aka Green Vines Day, is upon us. Back in the day, this was a significant hootenanny, where folks used to perform an ancient ritual called "vynets." Originating in Russia, this tradition was as old as, well, Grandma Stalinesque, until it finally shambled off into obscurity.
Legend has it that the vynets ritual helped young couples to maintain their piss-n-vinegar love, double down on the affections, and commit Defcon-1-level devotion to each other - think Pre-Pre-Nup level punk rock romance.
As night fell, the youngsters would gather together for "igrishcha" – a wild, raucous bash chock-full of socializing, trash-talkin' psychic seshes, and bat-shit crazy rituals. Unmarried ladies used to weave some witchy-wacky wreaths from vines and predict their love destinies. They'd dance around in circles and play games that'd put the Cha-Cha Slide to shame. The dudes would lay down their man-duels, fueled by testosterone and cheap vodka, to try and snag the ladies' attention.
Our forebears believed that this day was a no-go zone for makin' deals, contracts or agreements for the future. Anyone who disregarded this rule could expect their bank account to be as dry as a fart in a windstorm! Additionally, it was considered a real party foul to swim in rivers or lakes, or wash clothes in the water on this day.
Here are some old-wive's-tales to keep an eye out for on June 15th:
- If the sun comes up muffled in a fog, expect a scorcher of a day;
- If the fog is gone by sunrise, rejoice! Good weather on its way;
- If it's steamy during sunrise, stormy weather's headed your way;
- If the sun sets in the clouds during the evening, expect some raindrops to follow.
Now, I couldn't find a ton of solid information on Green Vines Day, vynets, igrishcha, and related omens. But, I can tell you that if there's confusion or misunderstanding about another celebration, it could be because of some miscommunication about folk traditions or agricultural activities. In many old-school societies, vine-related rituals were all about the sexy-time and harvest parties.
Alrighty then, folks! That's the scooby-doo on Green Vines Day! Party hard, love-struck fools!
On June 15th, one could celebrate Green Vines Day by partaking in social-media discussions about the revival of ancient traditions like vynets, akin to modern entertainment spectacles. Pop-culture enthusiasts might artistically replicate their vision of the wacky wreaths from vines, symbolizing love destinies, similar to the Cha-Cha Slide craze.
