"Couples planning wedding without basis, freely available for boycott on social media platforms: Brides-to-be beware of jilted cavaliers."

DISHING OUT A PETTY REVENGE FROM A SCRISHED SUITOR

It all started as a response to the rampant rudeness and dishonesty on dating platforms, and countless unsuccessful dates. Women took matters into their own hands, establishing special pages on social media to vet potential matches. Take, for example, a woman stumbles upon a date Online, only to realize that her virtual admirer is far from the man he pretended to be. Usually, he's married, but complaints extend beyond that. So, the wronged woman posts his photo on a dedicated page, accompanied by a warning: "Ladies, beware, he's a cheater, a freeloader (expected her to split the coffee bill), a jerk." These "shame boards" are updated regularly, with a vast following, and majority of them have a tale to share. We've previously written in-depth about this trend.

THE DEATH OF GENTLEMANLY CONDUCT

Men held their ground for quite some time. Some were offended and outraged, while others found it amusing - "Aww, how cute, the ladies are declaring war on us." They agreed on one point: responding in kind was not gentlemanly.

But they couldn't hold out for long. They spitted on the gentleman game and took to social media themselves, creating similar communities filled with brutally honest discussions among men and dire warnings about who's a "player" and how to steer clear. If a woman hurt a man's feelings, she'd have her photo placed on the page with a caption like, "Promiscuous, gold-digger." Prove it's just a small revenge from a spurned suitor.

One such infamous page, known as "The Market of Skins," was shut down by the authorities several years ago, with its administrators receiving real prison sentences. On that platform, they took things a step further than humiliation, publishing explicit personal photos and extorting money for removal[1].

However, not all such communities are this severe. They still exist, serving as a forum for men to share their pain and classify the women they've met online. A sort of shameful marriage registry no one wants to be on.

"SHE ORDERED A THOUSAND BUCKS IN ALCOHOL AND RAN OUT"

And here are the top 4 male gripes:

1. Her Highness.

1. The Most Common Grievance! Most Russian men struggle to handle a woman who makes it abundantly clear that she's well-aware of her value. For instance, Oleg recounts:

"Throughout our conversation, she constantly talked about the fancy restaurants she frequents, the stores she shops at, and the resorts she vacations at. She made it clear that her expectations were high. I couldn't afford that, and I wasn't even keen on it. She didn't impress me enough to rearrange my life to meet her demands."

2. The Deceiver.

Maty:

"I met her on a website, and she seemed wonderful. I suggested meeting at a restaurant to make a memorable impression. While I was away for just 5 minutes, she managed to order two expensive bottles of alcohol and bolted with them! I was left with the bill. It's not about the money, I could've bought them for her if she asked. The principle of the matter...."

3. Photoshopped Photos.

Nikita:

"From the get-go, she didn't want to video chat. She made excuses like her parents were home or she dropped her phone and broke the camera. When I asked for photos, she sent me a professional photoshoot. I knew the images had been retouched: perfect lighting, angles, and editing. I took a chance and invited her out. When she arrived, I barely recognized her. I have no idea why women feel the need to do this."

4. Requesting Financial Assistance from the First Date.

Alexander:

"As soon as we met, she started: I need money for school, for car repairs, can you lend me some? And she said it in a way that made it clear this was just the beginning, she’d have daily demands."

AVOIDING THIS MISERY

Other grievances are less common. It's almost heartbreaking that men are mainly worried about confident women (crown issues?) and are anxious about their wallets first.

Women, to avoid ending up in these categories and blacklists, men on these sites and pages advise: refrain from listing your demands and expectations on the first date. Let him make the first move, that's how it's supposed to be. Give each other time to observe. As Valery Syutkin once sang, "Give me just one chance..."

There's still a lingering unease. Reading through all this, it's hard to find sympathy for either side engaged in this conflict. The only thought is: boys and girls, there's no knight in shining armor for all of us.

[1] - Digital abuse and extortion: In some cases, these retaliatory actions can escalate into online harassment or digital abuse, where intimate images are shared without consent, and money is extorted[4].

[4] - Teen dating violence: Online dating and social media can sometimes be a platform for teen dating violence, with abusive partners using technology to intimidate or control their partners or ex-partners[2].

[2] - Impact on victims: Victims of these retaliatory actions often experience emotional distress and may feel vulnerable or exposed. This can further exacerbate the negative impacts of rejection and lead to a hostile online environment[3].

[3] - Prevention and awareness: Increasing awareness about digital safety and the effects of online harassment, promoting a healthy response to rejection, and advocating for respectful communication online can help reduce these issues[5].

[5] - Reporting incidents: Reporting such incidents to the appropriate authorities or platform moderators can help prevent future occurrences and ensure a safer online environment[1].

Some men found the emergence of shame boards on social media amusing, viewing it as a manifestation of women declaring war on them.
The "The Market of Skins" page, notorious for taking things a step further than humiliation and publishing explicit personal photos for extortion, was shut down by authorities several years ago.
One common male gripe on these platforms is encountering women who make no effort to hide their awareness of their perceived value, leading to unrealistic expectations and financial demands.
In some cases, digital abuse and extortion can escalate when intimate images are shared without consent, and money is extorted, a practice that is increasingly prevalent on such platforms.
To avoid ending up on blacklists and shame boards, men advise women to refrain from listing demands and expectations on the first date, letting the man make the first move, and giving each other time to observe.